Pause & Remember

Before the mantra was jobs, jobs, jobs, it was security, security, security.

The security of our nation, the security of our borders, the security of our everyday lives was at the top of the agenda.  No one could do enough to make America safe and secure.  And we were willing to do whatever it took to make it happen: reduced civil liberties, metal detectors and wands, pat downs, no shoes.

A decade later, 9/11 mastermind Osama bin Laden is finally dead as are some of his top operatives.  But how safe are we?

When the 10th anniversary of 9/11 arrives on Sunday, Americans will pause and remember where they were when they first saw or heard the shocking news of the attacks on New York City's Twin Towers, Washington, DC's Pentagon building and the crash of Flight 93 in Shanksville, PA.   

It was a horrific and terrifying day; a day when the unthinkable became reality.

It's a reality playing over and over again this week on television, newspapers, the web and magazine.  I have watched a few television specials this week featuring the live 9/11 footage of the planes crashing, the towers falling and people in NY and DC running to get out of the way of the attacks and find safety.  I think I've seen enough and will probably not watch any more 9/11 television because my memory of those events is clear.  I can flash back to those raw and gritty images all on my own.  The repetition of seeing the events is not a healthy or healing process for me.

Instead, I am looking for stories about people who courageously pushed through their pain and chose to rebuild their lives, turning their losses into the pursuit of a positive cause honoring the memory of the loved one they lost on 9/11.  One touching story that particularly stood out for me is the story of Jack and Lauren Grandcolas.  Lauren, 38, was pregnant when she died on United Flight 93, which was hijacked by the terrorists and crashed in a field near Shankesville, PA.  After battling grief and depression, Jack started a foundation in his wife's name that financially supports a state-of-the-art birthing room at Marin General Hospital in California. 

Here is a link to a short video and story about Jack and Lauren Grandcolas:

http://news.yahoo.com/pregnant-flight-93-victim-honored-by-husband-s-lasting-tribute.html

The Twin Towers, the Pentagon & Flight 93

When President Obama officially announced on television late last night that Osama bin Laden had been killed by U.S. forces in Pakistan, my thoughts went immediately to the relatives and friends of the thousands of people whose lives were lost in the Twin Towers, the Pentagon and Flight 93.

For almost ten years, these people have been trying to put the pieces of their shattered lives back together so that they may heal and perhaps build some kind of a future after having their loved ones violently taken from them.

 

I wondered how and what they were feeling now that bin Laden was confirmed dead:  relief, closure, happiness; maybe all of those things at the same time.  I'm pretty sure that as time has passed and each anniversary has been publicly marked, these relatives and friends have probably experienced every phase of grief and gone back again.

 

There is no official resting place for many of those lost in the catastrophic events of that day.  There is no cemetery marker for them to visit because there wasn't a body to claim and bury.  There is only the hallowed destinations of Ground Zero, the Pentagon and a field in Shanksville, Pennsylvania where Flight 93 crashed.

Firemen, policemen, window washers, waiters, stockbrokers, investment bankers, pilots and flight attendants; all were living their lives and carrying out their normal daily routines unaware of the destruction ahead; unaware of Osama bin Laden's evil plan.  As New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg said on the one-year anniversary:  ''They were our neighbors, our husbands, our children, our sisters, our brothers, and our wives. They were our countrymen and our friends. They were us.'' 

And the lives of those left behind to grieve were forever changed.

Each person who loses a loved one eventually comes to understand that they are on a personal journey that has no single path or prescribed time line.  Eventually, resilience can be learned and acquired for life.  Doctors say that good, strong relationships among family and friends and a sense of belonging to something bigger than yourself are essential in overcoming pain and suffering and starting the process of recovery.

Just as everyone remembers where they were when the tragic events of September 11, 2001 started  to take place,  most Americans will now also remember how they heard the long anticipated news that Osama bin Laden had finally been found and killed.  Neighbors and colleagues I talked to were filled with mixed emotions.  Initially, they were happy but then on reflection they were filled with sadness and fear for they said they know that the finality of this act for bin Laden doesn't put an end to the possibility of more acts of terrorism.

In Rome today, The Vatican issued a statement that came surprisingly close to striking the right tone:  "Osama bin Laden, as we all know, bore the most serious responsibility for spreading divisions and hatred among populations, causing the deaths of innumerable people, and manipulating religions for this purpose."

"In the face of a man's death, a Christian never rejoices, but reflects on the serious responsibilities of each person before God and before men, and hopes and works so that every event may be the occasion for the further growth of peace and not of hatred."