A Ripple Effect

Something To Think About. . . . . . .

 

 

 

Every little thing you do adds up,

 

and before you know it,

 

you've created your life.

 

And how you create your life

 

ripples out and effects everyone

 

and everything that crosses your path,

 

known or unknown to you.

 

                   ~ Kathy Freston

A Happier Friday!

Something as simple as the day of the week can make me happy.

I didn't even work five days this week because Washington, DC got so much snow on Monday that the federal government shutdown, the buses weren't running and I had the day off.

 

Still, today is Friday and that feels great.  The grind of this week is almost over and the weekend is within sight.

 

 

Friday evening is one of the best feelings in the world, don't you think? You've just finished working through one work week and now the whole incredible weekend is in front of you.  Have you ever noticed how happy everyone is on Friday evening when they are leaving their offices?

It's as though the principal rang the bell at school and announced "Recess!" I swear if I could bottle that Friday evening feeling I would make a ton of money. 
 

So embrace your fabulous Friday feeling and, better still, keep it going as long as possible.  Maybe you have plans to do something today you wouldn't do on any other day of the week!  Lighten up and spend some time playing.

Friday.  As Pharrell Williams sings in his infectious hit song, "Happy," I feel like a room without a roof. . . .

A Changed Life

Aging.  Knowing that it's happening to all of us is not very consoling.  I see the effects of the years of living on myself, especially when someone takes a picture of me.  I definitely don't like it and I wonder how I arrived at middle age so quickly.

 

I know that sounds so cliché but it's true.  I see those grey hairs working their way out of my scalp and for now those bad boys get dyed.  I also see lines starting to form on my face in places where I don't want them but I don't hate them so much that I would get botox injections or go under the knife.  Too scary.

 

As my mother says, "Every year is just a little more maintenance, and then a little more and then suddenly it takes you an hour to do what it used to take you ten minutes to do."  Okay Mom.  I am working to accept it for I know it's inevitable. 

 

That said, I do try to take care of myself and work hard to stay in shape and minimize the effects of the sun and other bad health decisions on my body; particularly my skin.  My personal theory about getting older is that it's all about your physical and mental energy: walking with a purpose, thinking good thoughts and approaching each day with a certain amount of zest!

 

I'm thinking of this subject today because a friend emailed me a recent interview NPR did with British author Penelope Lively (love her last name!) about her new book, Dancing Fish and Ammonites, a book that 81-year-old Lively says is about her "view from old age," a place I don't think about much because it once seemed to be a place so far, far away.

British author Penelope Lively

In particular in the interview, Lively talks about how it felt like to adjust to the unfortunate death of her husband, Jack, at 69-years old from cancer and her keen observations on how women and men adapt differently to going on with life after the death of a spouse.

Lively also notes that she is part of a new demographic in the Western world: for the first time, there's a large segment of the population over 80 and she notes that the effects of the additional time and attention it takes to care for such a large population of older people on the rest of society are yet to be seen.

Here, for all to read, and also listen to if you wish, is the link to Lively's NPR interview and pages from her insightful book:

http://www.npr.org/2014/03/17/290855933/author-penelope-lively-shares-the-view-from-old-age

Ina Garten's Roasted Eggplant Spread

I am tired of wearing layers of clothing.

Black and grey, grey and black.  Thin T-shirts under sweaters, sweaters over sweaters, vests over sweaters, socks inside socks, scarves over turtlenecks.  I think you are getting the picture of what it takes to stay warm when a polar vortex is happening.  I am more than ready to chuck my winter coat and boots and break out my fun clothes, my jammin' summer clothes.

But the calendar tells me otherwise.  For now, I must go with warmth because snow and ice and brisk winds will still be hanging out in my area of the world at least for another month. 

Besides the bulkiness and weight of the layers of clothes, the other downside of dressing like this is that you feel like you can indulge in comfort food since no one can see you in anything that's form fitting.  I try to remind myself that the food decisions I make today in the cold of February will determine how much I will have to diet in the warmth of April but the calendar's clinical numbers just don't seem to intimidate me.

My healing solution is to get off the sugar wagon and go for healthy, fresh foods that are tasty, yet low in fat, and no one does that better than Ina Garten, foodie and home entertainment expert extraordinaire who is also known as the Emmy Award winning host of the Food Network program, Barefoot Contessa. 

Ina's style is easy and uncomplicated and so are her recipes.  I share with you today Ina's Roasted Eggplant Spread which she says is "not only good, it is good for you."  Ina also says in her Barefoot Contessa cookbook that this recipe has "almost no fat for customers who like to save their calories for dessert."  She's so smart!

We all are trying to work more veggies into our diets and this is one way of doing it.  Ina recommends serving this with hummus, pita bread, Greek olives, feta cheese and stuffed grape leaves.  Check out Ina's recipe and I think you will agree that it's perfect served hot or cold:

 

Ina Garten's Roasted Eggplant Spread
Photo: Melanie Acevedo

 

Roasted Eggplant Spread (Serves 6 to 8 )  

I medium eggplant, peeled
2 red bell peppers, seeded
1 red onion, peeled
2 garlic cloves, minced
3 tablespoons good olive oil
1 1/2 teaspoons kosher salt
1/2 teaspoon freshly ground pepper
1 tablespoon tomato paste

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees.

Cut the eggplant, bell pepper, and onion into 1-inch cubes.  Toss them in a large bowl with the garlic, olive oil, salt and pepper.  Spread them on a baking sheet.  Roast for 45 minutes, until the vegetables are lightly browned and soft, tossing once during cooking.  Cool slightly.

Place the vegetables in a food processor fitted with a steel blade, add the tomato paste, and pulse 3 or 4 times to blend.  Taste for salt and pepper.

More of Everything

There is always more out there for us to discover and embrace  . . .

20 Things We Need To Say

Today is about something light and healing because lots of people will be traveling so that they can spend Thanksgiving Day with those they care about.

I love Kid President and his ability to make me and many, many others smile and laugh about the crazy things that happen in the unpredictable world around us.

He's irresistible!  I hope you agree!

 

Kid President

This new video is particularly cute (especially if you like corn dogs) and timely as Kid President reminds us of 20 things we need to remember to say more often to each other because these words repeated on a regular basis could make life go a little smoother for everyone . . . . . especially on Thanksgiving Day.

Here goes:

Digging Deep

I have previously written about people I know who are fighting the good fight against cancer.  Three of them at this point are in good health while one is gearing up for the fight of his life.

 

He is getting ready for surgery next week and after that he enters an intense, aggressive program aimed at totally killing this sucker in its tracks.  He has an amazing attitude towards this scary situation and I admire his calm and even demeanor.

 

 

Put in the same situation, I know I would not be faring so well and I don't think I would be inspiring anyone with my raw reaction to fighting a cancer within myself.

 

From talking to my friends, they say that first comes the disbelief that your body is so sick; that your body is basically at war with itself.  Your mind and heart are racing, racing at an incredible pace and you can't catch your breath as you take it all in.  While trying to come to grips with what the doctors are saying, you sometimes detach from reality a bit and feel as though you are outside yourself.  I understand this feeling very well because in the first few months after my husband's death, I definitely was outside myself.  I think it is your mind's way of temporarily buffering you from what's happening and giving you a way to cope.

Facing pain, whether physical, mental or a combination of both, can be isolating.  There is an intense feeling of letting the rest of the world fall away as you focus with laser concentration on what you need to do, have to do, to find wellness.

 

It is now a time of digging down deep and calling upon God to watch over him.  It is a time of feeling human and vulnerable.  It is a time of pulling out all the stops to give love, support and everything else we as a family can find to throw at him as he faces and fights this dreaded, yet survivable, disease.

Thank you for being here.  Peace.
 

A Positive Saturday Morning

Happy to wake up to a beautiful Saturday morning. . . time to try and undo the knots and tension from the work week. . . Easing into the day by taking deep breaths, stretching and slowly going about my tasks.

Today I'm in search of a good solid positive vibe.  Last weekend it was all about inner beauty and the way we see our fabulous selves.  Let's also go for broke in the health department. 

One of the ways I take charge of my wellness is by wearing A LOT of sunscreen to protect my skin from the aging rays of the sun and also by drinking LOTS of water!

I'd love to hear how you accentuate your inner beauty and your precious wellness!

Michael J. Fox's Morning

 

 

 

 

Good Morning, Morning.

 

I have a mindless routine in the morning, the same routine that I follow each work day.  I am never really ready to do anything until I have had at least one cup of hot tea.  I think I definitely take for granted that I can get myself going in the morning without taking any medication and without dealing with a physical handicap.

 

Unfortunely, that's not true for everyone.  That concept was really brought home to me after reading a short excerpt from in this month's Reader's Digest.  Always Looking Up, is the title of a book written by Michael J. Fox, the wonderful actor who currently star in CBS's hit show, The Good Wife, who was diagnosed a number of years ago with Parkinson's disease.

 

Fox's morning routine and his uplifting attitude about the consequences of his degenerative disease affecting the central nervous system made me refocus and think twice about any small discomforts I may deal with in my morning.  Fox's narrative is brave and honest yet optimistic.

Here goes:

Courtesy of Celebtoast.com

My Bright Mornings
By Michael J. Fox (From Always Looking Up)

 

This morning my wife, Tracy, is already up, dealing out breakfasts and readying the kids for school.  I blindly fumble a plastic vial from the nightstand, dry-swallow a couple of pills, and then fall immediately into the first series of actions that, while largely automatic, demand a practiced determination.  I swing my legs around to the side of the bed, and the instant my feet hit the floor, the two of them are in an argument. 

 

 A condition called dystonia, a regular complement to Parkinson's disease, cramps my feet severely and curls them inward, pressing my ankles toward the floor and my soles toward each other as though they were about to close in prayer.  I snake my right foot out toward the edge of the rug and toe-hook one of my hard leather loafers.  I force my foot into the show, repeat the process with the left, and then cautiously stand up.  Chastened by the unyielding confines of the leather, my feet begin to behave themselves.  The spasms have stopped, but the aching will persist for the next 20 minutes or so.

 

First stop: the bathroom.  I'll spare you the initial details of my visit, except to say that with Parkinson's, it is essential to put the seat up.  Grasping the toothpaste is nothing compared with the effort it takes to coordinate the two-handed task of wrangling the toothbrush and strangling out a line of paste onto the bristles.

By now, my right hand has started up again, rotating at the wrist in a circular motion, perfect for what I'm about to do.  My left hand guides my right hand up to my mouth, and once the back of the Oral-B touches the inside of my upper lip, I let go.  It's like releasing the tension on a slingshot and compares favorably to the most powerful state-of-the-art electric toothbrush on the market.  With no off switch, stopping means seizing my right wrist with my left hand, forcing it down to the sink basin, and shaking the brush loose as though disarming a knife-wielding attacker.  I can usually tell whether shaving is a good idea on any particular day, and this morning, like most, I decide it's too early to risk bloodshed.  I opt for a quick pass with an electric stubble trimmer.  Miami Vice lives.

 

A bench in the shower takes the pressure off my feet, and the steady drumbeat of the water on my back has a therapeutic effect, though if I sit here much longer, I might never get up.  Getting dressed is made easier by the pills, which have begun to assert their influence.  I avoid clothing with too many buttons or laces, though I'm still addicted to Levi's 501s, making me a fashion victim in the truest sense of the word.  In lieu of proper bushing, I raise my twitching fingers up to my hairline and, raking it back, hope for the best.  Executing a slow shuffle (my legs haven't yet earned my trust for the day), I make my way out to greet my family.

 

At the turn from our bedroom into the hallway, thre is an old full-length mirror in a wooden frame.  I can't help but catch a glimpse of myself as I pass.  Turning fully toward the glass, I consider what I see.  This reflected version of myself, wet, shaking, rumpled, pinched, and slightly stooped, would be alarming were it not for the self-satisfied expression pasted across my face.

 

I would ask the obvious question: "What are you smiling about?"

 

But I already know the answer: "It gets better from here."

 

A Cartful of Gratitude

Photo Courtesy of Williams Sonoma

Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you and to give thanks continuously.  And because all things have contributed to your advancement, you should include
all things in your gratitude.

                                                    ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Just like most Americans, I went to the grocery store this weekend to buy food to prepare for Thanksgiving dinner.

 

The store was crowded and the shelves were stocked with all of the things that I buy at this particular time of year: pumpkin, cream cheese, spices, nuts and cranberries.  Depending on the aisle I was in, I could tell people were carefully searching for certain ingredients for recipes traditionally served in their family every year.

 

For some people, it is just not Thanksgiving unless that particular dish is served.

 

In my family, it is the stuffing.  My siblings and I only want the stuffing that we had when we were growing up.  My sister-in-law is wonderful and she is very accomodating because she serves our family's stuffing along with a cornbread stuffing and also an oyster stuffing.  People in my family are pretty direct about what they want while walking through the buffet line and always ask when looking at the various stuffings (just to make sure): "Um, which one of these is our stuffing?"

 

It cracks me up because to us, and I know this is true for other families, Thanksgiving is all about the same food you have always eaten on Thanksgiving.  It is not a day to try out new food.

 

But if Thanksgiving is about Tradition, it is also about Gratitude.

 

As I shopped in the grocery store, I thought about how lucky I was to load my cart up with what I needed to serve for Thanksgiving and that when I pushed my cart to the check-out line, I knew that I would be able to pay for it.

 

Suppose I couldn't?  Suppose I couldn't afford what I needed and could only buy the minimum amount of food?  Suppose I couldn't afford any food and my Thanksgiving was at a soup kitchen or a homeless shelter?

 

Unfortunately, we fall into a common and bad habit of thinking about what we don't have, what is going wrong in our life or what is in our way to making progress.  Instead of thinking about what we don't have, I suggest we flip our thinking and focus on the positives in our lives and be thankful for the wonderful gifts that surround us.

 

Life cannot be truly rich without gratitude.

 

It may sound like a small thing but as I placed my items on the conveyer belt at the grocery store, I was truly grateful that I could buy food to feed myself and my loved ones and that I had a car and a home for shelter.  I take these things for granted when I never should.

 

Being thankful is counting your blessings and this week when I bow my head to give thanks to God for the food and the people in my life, I will have much to be thankful for.

Discovering Kris Carr

A relative who is also a close friend was recently diagnosed with breast cancer and she introduced me to the awesome books written by New York Times best-selling author Kris Carr.  I don't know how I missed her but I am now totally taken with her philosophy of assessing your personal priorities in order to successfully battle cancer and become a "wellness warrior."

Carr's blueprint for self-examination helps you to take stock of how much you actually exercise (not enough), what you actually eat (room for improvement) and what you should eat (more veggies) to how much stress (too much) and fun (not enough) exists in your life.  Kris Carr is all about empowerment plus she mixes it up with a fantastic sense of humor using terms such as "cancer posse" to describe those who have helped and supported her since her diagnosis, "CanSer babes" referring to herself and other women united in the battle against cancer and "Froot Loop mentality" noting the lack of nutrition in the standard American diet that is chock full of processed and sugar ridden foods.

I have never been diagnosed with cancer and I pray to God that I never am, but I am also fully aware of the risks of cancer in my family.  Relatives on both my mother and father's side of the family have fought various cancers and sadly, some have lost the fight.

But you don't have to be a cancer patient to appreciate and take advantage of Carr's information.  I immediately found her positive attitude and approach to life incredibly uplifting and was also struck by how adaptable her philosophy could be for people who are in various stages of grieving.  Reading the "Crazy Sexy Cancer" book series could recharge your inner you and perhaps give you a friendly kick in the butt to move yourself forward.  I know it did  for me.

Just to fill you in a bit about Carr, she was diagnosed with a rare and incurable stage 4 cancer in December 2003.  Doctors said chemotherapy, radiation and surgery could not help her.  "This whiskey tango foxtrot moment (that's military lingo for WTF?!) sparked a deep desire in me to stop holding back and start living like I mean it!," Carr said.  She then went on a deep healing pilgrimage and discovered a nutrient dense plant-based diet that put her in remission.

Carr has an amazing talent for crystalizing thoughts about life.  A sentence which immediately jumped off the page for me was: "Catastrophic moments in life force you to focus in on the immediate."  Wow!!  Is that ever true!!!  Everything shifts when you are handling a trauma and things that you once thought were important get deleted from your priority list.  You only have so much energy and you find that it has to be directed towards the catastrophic event in your life, not the things that drain you.

Being diagnosed with cancer is certainly a catastrophic and traumatic moment as is the death of a loved one.  When either of these things sadly occurs, you are feeling so many things at once it's hard to get a grip on what is happening to you.  That is why Carr's take-charge attitude is so helpful.  Ask for help, find help, keep looking for help and eventually your situation has got to improve if not physically, then mentally.

Another sentence in Carr's books that grabbed my attention was: "When you are living like you mean it, you are a force of nature."  It's very difficult in the beginning of grief to live your life like it means anything because you are in pain and have no enthusiasm.  At that point, all the cards have been thrown up in the air and you have no idea which way to go or what to do.  It's enough to throw on some clothes, try to eat and maybe go to the grocery store or call a friend....and sometimes the day turns into a lot of time spent sitting and staring at family pictures and wondering what happened.  That's okay too because it's all part of the healing process. 

Create your own pace and slowly, and I do mean slowly, you will begin to feel that it's possible to put one foot in front of the other and, as Kris Carr says, you will meet yourself and begin a new journey.