You Can't Sit Back & Wait

Did you ever complain about something you thought was going to be great but then it turned out to be a disappointing experience?

If you happened to complain to my mother about such a thing, then she probably would tell you that you have no one to blame but yourself because you get out of something what you put into it.

Which is the another way of saying that you can't sit on your butt and wait for stuff to come to you; you need to make the effort and go out there and take a chance and make some stuff happen.

Maybe it won't work the first time or the second time.  But you have to keep trying!

Check out the rainbow!

Happiness is not something that's ready made.

 

It comes from your own actions

 

                     ~ Dalai Lama

Delaying The Inevitable

I'm scared of things.  Lots of things.  And there are things that I really don't want to do.

 

But I usually force myself to do them.  Because eventually I know I will probably have to do them all by myself.

 

I could ask other people to do things for me but I always feel silly doing that because I know I can do it for myself.  Besides, by the time I ask someone else to do something for me and I explain what it is that I need done, I could have done it for myself.

 

I try to live my life by making choices that I feel good about but still there are situations I find myself in that I really don't like.  At all.

 

I don't like certain things that happen when I am at home and I don't like certain situations at work.  However, I don't have control over the majority of things I don't like or am scared of so I end up talking to myself and trying to work my way through these potential walls that could possibly make my life very narrow if I let them.

 

Everyone has something they're scared about; it's just that I don't want my "scary things" to stop me from enjoying spontaneous times with friends and family.  I listen to my "scarys" but I try never to act on them.  Last week I was invited to join some friends for dinner in a place I was not familiar with at all and I almost didn't go.

All I could imagine was that I was going to get lost and not know how to get out of where I was or I would make a wrong turn anf find myself driving on 95 heading south towards Richmond.  I really hate getting lost when I am by myself.  I talked to myself about the whole situation and how ridiculous it was to feel that way and then Google mapped my directions and then talked to myself again.

 

And then I went to dinner and had a great time!

 

Life is full of choices.  It's up to you which ones you decide to make.

 

You've got the power!!

 

Quietude

I am constantly reminding myself to chill out: when I am driving to and from work, when I am at work, or when I am in a situation where my expectations are not even close to matching up to reality.

 

Add to the equation a traumatic event such as the recent bombing at the Boston Marathon and the resulting increased security and it's no wonder that you, me and others are on edge.  Stressed out.  And the toll that stress takes on our physical health and mental well being is daunting.

 

I don't think I am alone in feeling this way.  No wonder people are finding it difficult to get along.  The work-hard-get-ahead lifestyle eventually catches up with you whether you admit it or not.  If you don't feel well, you're not going to act well.

 

So I'm thinking that we all can take it down a couple of notches and play better together.  One way that I try to play better with others is to remind myself to lower my voice.  If I can keep my voice in a monotone volume when talking to others then that does a lot to calm me.  I have a tendency to get excited when I am talking and then have a bad habit of raising my voice.  I'm getting better at achieving this but it's still something I need to constantly work on.

 

 

 

It's all about inner peace; a state of mentally and physically being in a calm place.  Peace of mind is generally associated with bliss and contentment.

 
Looking within myself to quiet my conflicts and trying always to smooth the rough edges is one way for me to try and get to a place of inner peace.  If I don't try to find and practice inner peace, then I can't very well go out in the world and deal with others in a civilized manner.  It really starts within me.

The words to John Lennon's infamous song, Imagine, come to mind:

 

Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace...

 

From big worries in your life to small inner butterflies, together let's look within ourselves and give inner peace a chance.

 

I Think I Can

Happy Friday Everyone!!

It feels good to reach the end of a work week, especially when we have a three day week-end in front of us.  Most of us will not have to go to work on Monday since it is Inauguration Day, the day when President Obama is sworn into his second term in the White House.

 

Whether you agree with President Obama's politics or not, I think everyone would agree that it takes courage and perseverence to have a dream and then set goals necessary to try and make that dream happen.

 

Big dreams or small dreams, I wish you all the luck in the world in making them become real.  I think you can do it and that's always an important first step.  After all, you will never know what will happen unless you try.

Here are two classic children's poems to give you a boost and get you going:

TRY, TRY AGAIN
'Tis a lesson you should heed,
Try, try again;
If at first you don't succeed,
Try, try again;
Then your courage should appear,
For, if you will persevere,
You will conquer, never fear;
Try, try again.

Once or twice though you should fail,
Try, try again;
If you would at last prevail,
Try, try again;
If we strive, 'tis no disgrace
Though we do not win the race;
What should you do in the case?
Try, try again.

Time will bring you your reward,
Try, try again.
All that other folks can do,
Why, with patience, should not you?
Only keep this rule in view;
Try, try again.

--Anonymous

 

 

 

 

IT CAN BE DONE

 

The man who misses all the fun

Is he who says, "It can't be done."

In solemn pride he stands aloof

And greets each venture with reproof.

Had he the power he'd efface

The history of the human race;

We'd have no radio or motor cars,

No street lit by electric stars;

No telegraph nor telephone,

We'd linger in the age of stone.

The world would sleep if things were run

By men/women who say, "It can't be done."

 

 

A Year of Blessings

How Have You Been Blessed?

I know we are in the middle of January, but I just saw this idea on a website called The Honest Company (www.honest.com) and I wanted to share it right away.  Hopefully, this idea is new for you too!

 

Here's the basic idea:  At the beginning of a new year, start writing down blessings that happen to you throughout the year and put them in a container.  On New Year's Eve or Day 2014, you can empty out the jar and read all about the year of blessings that you had!

 

The Honest Company's blog suggested writing down wishes or memories made throughout the year but I thought writing down blessings whenever you think of them instead of memories and wishes would be a positive way and perhaps a reinforcing way to look for the good things that happen to you as you heal. 

 

Rebuilding your life and trying to find a new way to live your life after the loss of a loved one is a slow process that has many stops and starts.  I have found that it sometimes is a subtle process too.  Everyone's journey is unique.  Small changes can be happening to you and you may not be aware of it.

 

What kinds of things am I talking about?  For me, my sleep pattern started changing as I began to gather strength after my husband's death.  Instead of tossing and turning or hardly sleeping at all, slowly I began to be able to fall asleep and stay asleep for longer periods of time.

 

What a blessing!

 

Blessings happen to us every day and we may take them for granted.  The sun is shining, someone smiled at you, your jeans fit.  A blessing can be whatever you think is a positive thing that has happened to you!  I try to tell myself that no matter how bad the day was, there had to be something good in it.  You know what those days are like.  Those days when everything seems to go wrong or it doesn't happen the way you planned?

 

I still try to find a positive in all that frustrating stuff.  Sometimes it's just a blessing that the day is over and you can wake up fresh and try again the next day.  I know life can be painful but if I can't change the circumstances then I have to try and learn to roll with it and find some good somewhere. 

 

Have fun with this blessings idea.  It doesn't have to be an every day thing.  You can write down whatever you want whenever you want to write it down.  But at the end of the year it might surprise you to look back on the blessings that took place in your life in 2013.

 

Last night I found a container for my blessings and I wrote down two: a wonderful son and good health.

 

What are your blessings?